A lot of people believe that when other people react they caused it. That some people have the kinds of personality that you can predict how the room will react. Or they look for patterns to support this idea. One thing that I find frustrating is when people come into therapy to ask what is it about them that makes people react the way that they do. Not to burst any bubbles here but most people are thinking about themselves and I have...

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Many people experience depression during the winter but does it have to be like this? There are certain steps that we can take to beat off the winter blues. Some that come to mind are things that you do physically like getting rest, exercise and eating right.   It is also important, even if you don’t want to go out in the cold to be social. Though I prefer movies, music a good book! Some people even sit under sun lamps. But you know all of this...

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You look at your life and you are dissatisfied. You are not where you want to be. And you want to know how to change it. There are two things in play here and making changes in these two areas will move you and change your circumstances. The way you think and your position in your social and work sphere. There is an old saying that says “wherever you go there you are.” You take you everywhere you go and one of the most important things to...

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We do not value our families as much as we value prestige and money.  In other words the opinion of others is more important than asking ourselves what we want  When a woman starts thinking about having children, Sheryl Sandberg said, “she doesn’t raise her hand anymore … She starts leaning back.”  So how bad would laid back be?  It sounds like a criticism to think about children. That by not raising our hand we are doing something wrong! What...

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When I was younger and competing to get into schools and then competing to stay in them I thought there would be a moment when I had arrived when It happened. I wasn’t quite certain what it was but what it would mean is that everything would become effortless. I think you see the handwriting on the wall faster than I did. When I proved myself I had just thrown myself in a bigger pond and the cycle began again. But what happens over time is that...

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  We place ourselves on hold until we do something wonderful.  We do it because we are chasing life instead of living it. Until that happens we are living on potential and living as if we were constantly operating on default.  I will be enough when I make enough money, when I have a relationship when I am in school etc. When I was younger I calmed my anxiety down by assuring myself that I had potential and one day someday the world would know...

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